Sunday, January 9, 2011

Oh Christ-mas Tree, Oh Christ-mas Tree, My Break Was An Entire Month Looooong

After living out of a suitcase for just under 3 weeks, my pale ass is back in OKC and finally settled in! It took about 3 days to get used to my new room layout (apparently my choice of furniture placement doesn't show well to potential buyers)... it took about 3 minutes to get used to the weather - and by "get used to", I mean "decide I'm never going outside" ... but it only took 3 seconds to get used to having nothing to do and nowhere to be :) Much like opposable thumbs and my Potawatomi heritage, I really took Christmas Break for granted. I haven't had time to organize my sock drawer since May of 2001 and it's amazing, this thing called free time!

Christmas was one of the best yet. The OtherOtherWhiteMeat is walking all over the place, usually in circles, and climbing all over things. Except ChuckECheese. This pretty much tells the story about how that trip went...

He won't be afraid when he figures out you get DOUBLE tokens for each 'A' on your report card. That's like 5 extra go 'rounds on the Siiiide Winder. Man, I love that place.

So also this Christmas break, I met my new parents! I've known them all my life, but it's just recently that the image of bell bottoms and long hair (on both of them) has given rise to a sweet little picture of pure country. Apparently most every night, dad puts on some tunes and a fire, mom pours a glass of wine and they watch their favorite evening entertainment, Perry the possum. He walks across the backyard to the leftover birdseed on the ground, eats it, and walks back across the yard. Ya'll, they talk about it for like 30 minutes and sometimes text their daughters something fascinating like: "Perry stopped in the clearing and looked over at us." The build up is almost too much to handle! I MEAN, WHAT WILL PERRY DO NEXT?? I got to witness this activity, if you will, with my own eyes... it only seemed natural to take Perry's picture and introduce him to the internet...

Right in tune with this new CountryBumpkin image I have of them and their love for sprawling land, peace and quiet, my dad planned a little vacay to Quartz Mountain near Altus, OK to watch some eagles. I saw ONE, from about 300 yards away, but the other part of the vacation was awesome. I rode next to CountryBumpkin's offspring, Sleeping Diva, through a bunch of cotton fields, small towns and tumani tutanka (c'mon, you haven't seen Dances With Wolves?)

We stayed in a little cabin amongst Rudolf's prancing cohorts, naked trees and, according to our father, some boogeymen... one of which tried to attack me our last night there. OKAYYY, what I thought was a white midget boogeyman moving very fast, might have been my mom walking down the hallway with a pillow. But it freaked me out... we had just watched Fargo!

We ate lots of delicious food, climbed gorgeous mountains, enjoyed many-a-game of dominoes (most frustrating game EVER to play with this sarcastic family), went for nature walks and runs and picked cotton from a nearby farm. We made Alyssa do that, just in case Farmer Johnson was sittin' on his porch with a rifle.

Then there was the Dude Ranch. I was so excited to put on what I thought was a Dude Ranch outfit, until my big sister delivered The Low Blow of the vacation when she said I looked 'so metropolitan'. THE NERVE. I'm known for being a bit sensitive, but I shrugged it off nicely if I do say so myself. And tapped into the Beverly Hillbilly in me for the obligatory pose with hay and a pitchfork.

Seriously? Metropolitan?? w h a t e v e r

We have a house showing in like .5 seconds. This just turned into a 2-part series. Goodbye now.

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